Male Feminist?

                         Clearly gay or trying to get laid

There’s no such thing, ammirite, fellas!? Women belong in the kitchen! If they are not they must be trying to prove something, right? Clearly they can’t make it as pretty adornments so they must be fat, ugly, or slutty. They sure as hell can’t effectively fight a man, or do a ‘man’s job’, or decide their own sexuality, or worship something other than a male god or resist their biological imperative to be baby factories or decide what to do with their bodies or not dress to seduce those helpless rapists or not be stoned/burned/buried/drowned/beaten/mutilated to death for any of the above infractions, RIGHT?

Okay okay, maybe I sounded off a little more than I should have. Maybe you don’t think so. But why in the hell would a guy give a shit about that stuff, anyway? After all, we are told in countless media and throughout our varied cultural upbringings that when brought before a woman, men are just mindless beasts and we can’t help but be crass, juvenile, knuckle-dragging, drooling lunatics who just wanna ‘get some’. Its certainly not possible for us to have a dialogue with a woman we find attractive and not simultaneously want to fuck her, RIGHT?

Thats what the world you have been living in has been pounding into your head (maybe not quite so bluntly). No matter where you are (and I’ve been around) varying degrees of sexism against women AND men are prevalent. From women being denied certain jobs (Women serving the military in combat roles!? Outrageous! Back to the offices with you!) To men being told juvenile and even violent behavior is justified because of their gender.

Okay but you’re not that kind of guy, right? You know you’re a decent sort. What do you care about feminism? Even if it really is about how cultures approach human rights as a whole, you don’t want anything to do with some matriarchy-loving crap! Besides, guys who claim to support feminists are…

JUST TRYING TO SCORE!
                             Yeeeeeeeah! Thats why I’m a ‘feminist’! Booyah!

Guys who listen to women. Men who pretend to frown when girls prattle on about women’s rights. Dudes who showcase their ‘feminism’ are just trying to get laid, right? It makes sense. Clearly in this age of minority empowerment, women would fawn all over guys that share their feminazi views.

Except that doesn’t make sense…at ALL. Unless you go around holding a “I need feminism because…” sign 24/7 how the hell would women know thats what you’re about? A t-shirt? Cool. Cool. Thats worth a shot. Or you could slip it into random (or every) conversation you ever have when within earshot of a nice ass, but if it were really that easy to get a random woman to start foaming at the mouth over a man-feminist, why the hell aren’t YOU doing it right now!? Go ahead! Go out on a college campus with a megaphone and start droning on about how you love ‘dem wominz rites!’ and just wait for the fanfare.

No?

Okay. So then is it something that you see mostly on the web? Then what kind of odd-ball world do you live in where someone can ‘get laid’ by ‘acting’ like a feminist online? What kind of secret prize do these men who ‘act’ like they give a shit get?

I don’t know, but when you figure it out, you be sure and get back to me, pronto because this ‘white knight’ is behind on some much deserved come-upins!

MEN THAT CARE ARE GAY

Only he could ever REALLY be a feminist!

Really, the only way that a dude could really give a shit about feminism is if he was a cross-dressing or closet homosexual. I mean, thats the only explanation! I mean sure, Mr. Dafoe there is about to shoot the shit out of some fucking mobsters and save the two straight white male heroes, but he is DEFINITELY going to give a blowjob to one of those gangsters first! For sure!
Also, according to my ‘extensive’ online research, being a man-feminist is almost certainly linked to being gay. That or being a slick pimp-daddy. But definitely not both!

Why, you may ask? Because these are the default insults to any guy who shows genuine (or other ways) interest in women’s rights. Why the hell should he care? Oh he either wants to get some or bend over and be a broad himself. Thats the only explanation, you guys!

As a matter of fact, feminism in general is for-sure-you-guys linked to being gay no matter what your sex. If a woman proclaims to be a feminist, she clearly is very ugly/butch/gay and hates men and most certainly wants to cut off your balls, dude!

At least, thats what the men making those posts seem convinced of. But don’t worry guys, its not just you who has your eyes open! Plenty of women will say they are all about equal rights but get super defensive if you try to suggest that she may indeed be a feminist.

Why? Because feminism = unattractive and we wouldn’t want ‘our’ women to be that, would we? No sir. So you better pretty yourself up and tell those gay, sugar-daddy men and ugly women feminists to shut the hell up!

Okay, so enough sarcasm.

/deep breath

I wrote this because for every pro-woman argument I have come across I have found a dozen whining about how both men AND women can be ‘terrible’. As if it is somehow necessary to point out that highly skewed and obvious fact, and that fact somehow invalidates the need for a female perspective.

It is the equivalent of a Nazi saying, “Hey remember that one guy who didn’t torture a lot of people? See! Nazis aren’t all bad!”

Godwin’s Law of Lolz: Sooner or later Nazis and Lolcats will be mentioned simultaneously

Obviously I – a dominant male – am not calling men Nazis. I am merely commenting on the fact that no women ever invented a Nazi party.
(for a loooooooooong list of what women DID invent look here)

But these “oppressed” man’s pride or ‘anti-misandry’ guys don’t just complain about the unfairness of women’s rights, or how they feel those rights emasculate them, do they? They also shame any man that disagrees with them using tactics I have covered above. Words from a leader in that pro-dude movement: Here.

Men complaining about women’s rights is the equivalent of a white guy complaining about the civil rights movement in the USA or a religious zealot displaying thinly veiled homophobia (its not really a phobia, is it Mike?) while hiding behind religious texts for justifications.

If women are to be considered a group of people, than in my humble opinion, and in a matter of numerical fact, all the racism, homophobia, and war causalities in the history of humanity do not compare to the atrocities that MEN have committed against WOMEN, all while protected by patriarchal social validations.

For anyone arguing that while, ‘yeah shit was bad a while ago but its all good now!’

Consider that a woman in South Africa will be raped every 26 Seconds.
Not convinced? How about the femicide happening in India and China:

“I am a feminist because women don’t have the most basic of human rights – the right to live safely, simply because they are female. By 2030, India will have systematically eliminated 20% of women from its population, annihilated both before and after birth — only because they are female. And China will have similarly eliminated 20% of its female population. Since these two countries together constitute 40% of the human population, the implication of this is global. This is a genocide – the systematic and deliberate destruction of a targeted human group—on a scale that’s historically unprecedented. Furthermore, there’s not one country in the world where women are not subjected to one or another form of violence, like rape, sex-trafficking, “domestic” violence, random femicides, lethal customs like FGM — because of their gender. Women live in fear of their safety and lives, inside and outside their homes, everywhere, all the time, in a way that men never have to. Yet, governments and international bodies don’t see this as a violation of the basic human rights of a group that constitutes one-half of the human race.” – Rita Banerji

Still not close enough to home for you?
That suggests that at least one woman that you know or will know will have been the victim of gender-specific violence.

Still don’t give a shit? How about slavery? Thats strike a cord? No? Fuck those guys? How about slavery of children? Not just in Russia. But in the first world. Good ol’ US of A.
RAINN (an anti-sexual assault organization) quotes the United States Department of Justice statistics that:
1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys will be sexually assaulted before they reach adulthood.

I bring up this modern day slavery (human trafficking, they call it) because it is almost exclusively based around sexual exploitation of women and children–meaning it is a feminist issue.

WHAT THE HELL IS ‘FEMINISM’ ANYWAY?

According to my own humble opinion and experience with (believe it or not) other ways ‘normal’ women-who-are-also-feminists, Feminism is the idea that women and men are equal as human beings and recognize that modern-day patriarchal societies are detrimental to both sexes (that last part is why it is different from humanism).

Thats it. Thats all it is.

     No castrations required!

Now, maybe (and despite being a dominant male) I personally belong more in the drow-society matriarchal-take-over kind of camp, but that is certainly a minority and not what feminists at large represent–at all.

So why aren’t more people feminist?

Is it just because certain men are threatened by the idea of women accomplishing something worthwhile?
Is it women unwilling to be shamed and labeled as radical and therefore unattractive?
Is it dudes just afraid of being called gay?

I think its a large combination of all of that with a healthy does of (willful or not) ignorance and (definitely willful) apathy. People just don’t give a shit.

Well I do give a shit and I’m not ashamed to say:

I AM A FEMINIST.