Women = Children!?

Posted: September 10, 2012 in Feminism
Tags: , , , , ,

All she really needed was a good whoopin’ to set her straight, but I’m a Man’s Man so I always go the ‘extra mile’!

Okay so this has been bugging me for some time now. And by ‘bugging’ I mean it makes me both enraged (as misogyny does) and confused at the same time (does the word ‘incredulous’ fit here?).

Be it due to the same cultural problem that I am referring to or not, consensual sadomasochism is perfectly fucking fine (not that you need my approval). Whatever works.
I understand BDSM lifestyles. I understand S&M kink. I understand role-play. I understand that no relationship is truly 50/50 and there will always be a ‘dominant’ and a ‘submissive’ role to fill to some extent and that those roles can shift.

I even understand being indoctrinated to love your own oppression or to find justifications to enjoy privilege at the expense and suffering of others.

That last one is what I am taking issue with here. A prevalent, culturally encouraged attitude that men and some women seem to find appropriate: treating the woman like a kid. EG: punishing a woman with humiliating beatings using a belt or spankings (again not the play kind) and deprivation of things/privileges within a relationship (further ingraining they are all indeed things the man has power over).

Essentially, this ‘women are dipshit children’ mentality validates emotionally bringing women down or physically punish them. And the woman has been indoctrinated to accept this via her coy, unobtrusive, unassertive, submissive conditioning. After all,’Its for her own good!’, the man is always right and as a Man’s Man you need to ‘Teach’ her whether she likes it or not. If you never domesticate and break in a horse it will never know how you like to ride, right? Its for the horse’s own good, really. “Man Up!” and teach that bitch!

If via this mentality a woman is so dense that she can’t decide what is good and right for herself, than is that a good excuse for raping her? I mean, its not like she ‘knows’ what she wants. That’s what you – a man! – is there for! I bet to ‘dudes’ who follow this logic it makes perfect sense.

I hope I am making myself clear, because I am thoroughly confused by this shit. It seems that to people who think like this (again men and women who have been taught overtly or conditioned thorough their upbringing) believe that men are the ‘adults’ and women are like little kids who need to be held by the hand and sternly ‘raised’ into domestic servitude lest they stray into…I don’t know, temptation? Education? Existentialism? Basically the premise is that the woman is so fucking feeble minded that she NEEDS a man to beat/punish her into doing the ‘right’ thing. It goes right hand in left hand with the idea of ownership in romantic relationships and fits snugly into the even more culturally acceptable expectation of the male/female = dominant/submissive construct.

Yay! Coffee! Wait, WTF is this shit!?

What I do not understand is how if the philosophy of the woman literally being treated like an ignorant child is something that is socially acceptable how it can be just as socially acceptable to then have romantic relations with her. In other words, its illegal to have sex with kids, but it is a-okay to FUCK a woman you treat like a child? What the fuck is this shit and how do people rationalize it without overtly admitting inclinations toward pedophilia!? (And what the hell is up with nicknames like “Baby”, “Doll”, “Shorty”, “Gurl”, “Little one” etc, all clearly infantile references and predominantly used toward females by perspective intimate partners–what kind of jacked up mentality does that propagate?)

Obviously in my rush to get to the point I’ve skipped over some things so let me backtrack and clarify that treating a woman like shit/property/imbecile/abusing her in the first place (or your kids for that matter) is not at all okay or ‘normal’ no matter how your backwards, profligate ass was brought up. In fact if you are actively participating in those actions outside of consent than you or society/parents/religion etc have already brainwashed that sentient being you are abusing to not effectively resist you which makes you less a ‘man’s man’ and more a ‘degenerate knuckle-dragger punk ass bitch’.

We are all shaped by our environments. It is inevitable. If a child-soldier forced to violence can later in life be free to choose to do great good in the world than what kind of nature vs nurture argument can someone harming another sentient being for pleasure make to justify or excuse their actions? Fuck all thats what.

I hope I have drawn the clear difference between a sexually different-from-the-norm lifestyle and socially complacent domestic violence; I am scrutinizing the obscenely cheerful popular acceptance of the latter as ‘the norm’. Treating women like children is only slightly below the trope of a woman’s place being in the kitchen or ‘teaching’ her a lesson or taking care of/having kids as some garbage ‘biological imperative’. No. We are sentient beings. We have Choice. This is but a thoroughly ingrained (and disgusting) social construct.
It is NOT healthy. It is NOT normal. It is not natural. It is BULLSHIT.

Advertisements
Comments
  1. likamarie says:

    Well, you know, not only is it bullshit in it’s fullest meaning, but, I’m very surprised that MOTHERS teach their DAUGHTERS this… Total seriousness.

    MY very own mother was trying to get me to understand that it’s not lady like to chase men (as in, if I found one attractive, I shouldn’t just go for it, I was supposed to be coy, or something nonsensical like that). Then, she was even trying to get me to be “obedient”, even if it meant to her, and she herself would use humiliation tactics, or play the victim herself.

    Good or bad, my first husband was the male version of my mom, just the uneducated version. Bad. But, my sweet Chad was my blessing. Good.

    Thing is, I’m too rebellious to fit in a box, and I dare to break the box, or sit it up on it’s side to stand on “top” of it, now that it’s on the side…

    But then again, my mother still gets talked to like a child at times, and well, it’s difficult for me to be a good Christian to honor my mother, when at times, she’s MIA in her own head.

    • Thank you for your comment. That is exactly the kind of insider perspective I was looking for since I still am not quite sure how well I communicated my point in this post.

      • likamarie says:

        I fully agree with you that in a role play situation, a fantasy of this sort can be healthy, if both partners are willing participants. But to apply it to reality is creepy, if you ask me. Because in THAT case, truth is more bazaar than fiction, and made for True TV…

      • Well the problem is that when its a social construct as opposed to a consensual fetish, the lines and distinctions are not only clear but are ingrained as normal and can are damaging.

      • likamarie says:

        It can be damaging, but, mature people should be able to know where those boundaries are, and in what confines they exist. If they can’t, they have no business crossing that line.

        Unfortunately, Americans in general are fairly immature in the sex/sexuality/sensual aspect of our lives, yet we tend to push the limits the furthest.

      • The way I see it, Americans tend to fall into one of two extremes on the subject.
        Either they
        A. Trudge through their ‘holy’ unions. Suffering them like some kind of terrible, boring chore, emulating the (likely) dysfunctional status quo their parents demonstrated to them, terrified of deviating from the norm lest their respective communities scorn them (saw the same thing in the USSR except there it was ‘for the State’ as opposed to ‘for God’ which is more common in the USA).
        OR
        They go in the completely opposite end of the spectrum, rebelling against the above idea. They flock to whatever they see as the most ‘edgy’, strange or extreme, likely without any understanding of whether they, as people are ready, compatible with, or even capable of that different lifestyle. Like you said, they lack ‘maturity’, bungling about like children except their lack of care is damaging to not only themselves but others as well, moreso, probably. For example men who claim to be “Doms” and think that mostly just entails violence and acting like a superior asshole is about as narrow-minded and erroneous a perspective as believing that parenting is mostly about ass-whoopings.

        ~From Russia with Love

      • likamarie says:

        Excellent observations!

        I never looked at it that deeply, but, it’s true.

      • likamarie says:

        Excellent observations!

        I’d never looked into it that deeply, but, you’re right.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s